Crystal Gayle - "We Must Believe In Magic" (1977)

Rating: 5

I own two records by Crystal Gayle, who I had never heard of prior to that fateful day when I bought four boxes of records for $70. Apparently she was a somewhat popular country singer in the late 70s and early 80s but has faded into obscurity today, being most notable for being the younger singer of Loretta Lynn and having recorded a soundtrack album with Tom Waits. Both of these facts give her some credibility in my eyes, and although I am not exactly a country buff, I did find the pure country songs on We Must Believe in Magic to be tolerable. Gayle has a nice, though not exceptional voice and she's preferable to most modern country for sure.

The problem with this record is that the notion of trying to have a crossover hit had already seeped its way into Nashville, and several tracks here are misguided attempts to blend the horn section and rhythm of a disco song with the steel guitars of a country song (well, it was 1977). The main offenders are the disco-country cover of Cole Porter's "It's All Right with Me" (as awful as it sounds) and the closing title track, a synthesizer-led adult contemporary ballad that really isn't country at all and featuring lyrics about Alpha Centauri, ensuring that it would be dated by 1978.

So apart from the efforts to be modern, the country songs here are decent. But I'm not a country buff, so those songs aren't enough for me to rate this as a good album. They're decent, but they're not George Jones. Blue bin!

Paul Carrack - "Suburban Voodoo" (1982)

Rating: 5

According to allmusic.com, Paul Carrack was "pop music's ultimate journeyman," with "his finest work coming at the expense of his own identity." Shockingly, these traits make for a thoroughly mediocre solo album. Produced by Nick Lowe, Suburban Voodoo sounds pretty much exactly like Lowe's own Labour of Lust, with elements of Squeeze thrown in (who Carrack also sang for). Carrack's vocal style is ostensibly soulful, but fails to convey really much of anything.

Still, I do use the word mediocre in the literal sense, and nothing here struck me as being bad necessarily. The production is good enough that it all sounds perfectly pleasant and there are some catchy guitar riffs and choruses to be found here and there. If I had been listening to it as background music, I might even have convinced myself that this record was a keeper. But outside of the first track "Letter of Love," no song really held my interest from beginning to end. For that reason, although I found it much preferable to 1987's One Good Reason (which proved that without Lowe's production, Carrack quickly moves from mediocre to bad), Suburban Voodoo fails my most fundamental criterion, which is whether I ever see myself wanting to listen to it again. Blue bin!

U2 - "No Line on the Horizon" (2009)

Rating: 5

It had certainly seemed to me that although U2 is no doubt past their prime, that at least they had settled into being a veteran band that could pump out a decent album every four or five years. No Line on the Horizon, though, kind of sucks, and drawing from the authority of having listened to every single U2 studio album, I declare this to be the worst record they've ever released. Well, at least tied with Pop.

The album is split up into very distinct sections - the first five songs are in the same basic style as How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb, if not quite as dynamic and somewhat overlong, but at least this section fulfills the basic prerequisites of good U2 music, anthemic choruses and thick, chiming Edge guitar riffs. The next two songs are basically weaker re-writes of "Vertigo" and "All Because of You" from the last album, and somehow, "Get On Your Boots" (also the lead single!) is just as irritating as "Vertigo." And finally, after that brief and unwelcoming interlude, the band finishes the album with four more songs in the same style as the first five - the difference being that none of these has anything resembling an interesting melody or guitar part, thus ensuring that my final impression of the album is one of utter boredom.

So although the first part of the album is solid, it doesn't even hit the high points of their last two albums, and certainly doesn't make up for six songs in a row that I don't care for at all. But don't listen to me, Rolling Stone gave it five stars, so it must be great! Blue bin all the way.